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abruzzese [7]
3 years ago
10

Can you you edit and make this paragraph better . Plz I really need your help.

English
2 answers:
Simora [160]3 years ago
8 0

As I slowly regain my senses, I can feel the rapid heat from the spreading blue flame that causes the fluid within the wood to boil and then evaporase into ash. As I slowly open my eyes the blurry vision starts fading away, I see burning buildings and human corpses everywhere. I ask myself what happened to the impenetrable kingdom of Camelot when I was unconscious. What I see in front of my eye gives the answer and a prolonged shock. A mythical dragon the “jabberwocky”, that everyone fears, forms before my eyes. The Jabberwocky is humongous, scaly and stands tall. Its wings flap swiftly as the moonlight makes it simmer. It has got flames in an endless rage in its eyes. The Jabberwocky is roaming in the Camelot kingdom and brining destruction with its strong, sharp jaws that devour everything.

scoundrel [369]3 years ago
6 0

Answer:

As I slowly started to regain my senses, I felt the powerful heat from the fiery blue flames spreading, causing the fluid within the wood to boil and vaporize into ashes. I slowly open my eyes, as the blurry vision started fading away. Before me, I saw burning buildings and corpses scattered around me. I wondered in disbelief, what happened to the kingdom of Camelot in my absence. What I saw in front of my eyes was all the explanation I needed. To my incredulity formed a jabberwocky, it was a humongous, scaly, creature that stood tall. As the wings flapped in the firelight they shone like the moon. It had the endless rage of the flames in its eyes. Roaming the kingdom of Camelot and continually bringing destruction with its jaw that could cleanly bite me in half.

Explanation: Really great start, you just needed to reword a few things. Hope this helps.

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