Question

I am writing a poem to send off to the 2015 K1 poetry contest. Please tell be what you think and any adjustments I need to make.

Answer 1

Its really quite well written; it was really emotional. Just some small changes: In the third line of the 3rd stanza, it should be "They're afraid to go to school" , not "their". 

also, i would recommend removing "but" in the 4th stanza. 

and the last line of the piece tells the people to be crazy, which im sure you didnt mean. I think it should be "be sane" or "don't be insane"

really nice writing though. 

Answer 2

It's great! I would change some of the more graphic parts just a little, but other than that it's great! I'm entering one, too.