3 years ago

I am writing a poem to send off to the 2015 K1 poetry contest. Please tell be what you think and any adjustments I need to make.

2 answers:

4 0

Its really quite well written; it was really emotional. Just some small changes: In the third line of the 3rd stanza, it should be "They're afraid to go to school" , not "their".

also, i would recommend removing "but" in the 4th stanza.

and the last line of the piece tells the people to be crazy, which im sure you didnt mean. I think it should be "be sane" or "don't be insane"

really nice writing though.

AfilCa [17]3 years ago

3 0

It's great! I would change some of the more graphic parts just a little, but other than that it's great! I'm entering one, too.

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Please help, asap!!!!!