Analyzing How to Revise a Draft Read these sentences from a student's draft. The firefighters went to the wrong place. It took t
hem too long. Which revision is the best example of adding concrete details? The firefighters responded when “shouts of ‘Fire!’ were heard” (Murphy 33). They were quick to arrive but had already wasted time. Tired and unsteady, the firefighters were not prepared for the job. It took a while. A signal mistake cost time because “dozens of firefighters were sent on a wild-goose chase” (Murphy 33).
