An author can establish an authentic, natural voice by using realistic details and by creating an authentic experience for the reader.
One of the elements readers value the most is to find an authentic or natural voice. This implies when the reader starts reading a novel or another text he/she finds the words and details seem to be realistic and they flow naturally.
This element is challenging for new writers but it is often achieved through:
Realistic details: If the story is based on the author's real experience, ideas, etc. then the voice is authentic and it will be believed by readers even in a fictional story.
Authentic experience: Readers expect to find an entertained but complex story. This is achieved is the author uses words, characters, settings, etc. to provide readers an experience rather than only a description of events.
Note: This question is incomplete because the first page of the novel is not given and the title of the novel is not mentioned; due to this, I answered it based on general knowledge.
The other discussion participant is very bland and open-ended with how she answers. She is not involved at all in the conversation and is just answering with simple answers to make it seem like she actually knows what she is talking about. This causes the conversation to be one-sided.
