You could seek the help of a tutor to understand more about the class, and learn new things.
This line comes from "The Things They Carried" by Tim O Brien when he served in Vietnam. The term hard vocabulary to contain terrible softness simply reflects what he has done to serve in Vietnam. In times of war, it is not good to be internally soft as it may serve as weakness to enemies. Therefore, hard vocabulary refers to the words that one would say to himself and others in order to project strength and hide softness or weakness inside.
This sentence means a character had decided upon a certain action for a problem in their head. however other characters (the peers in this example) bestowed an act of kindness or "did something nice" for this other characters in hopes that he/she would change their mind. A good example would be if you upset your parent by acting up and they said no to a sleepover. you would do chores or act kindly towards them in order to try to get them to change their mind and say yes.
Todd is reluctant to join the Dead Poets' Society because he doesn't like reading aloud. He doesn't feel comfortable doing that which is why he is hesitant to join the club. However, Neil helps him by telling him he should just come and join them, and he doesn't have to read until he is ready to do so.
