Question

Anya is revising her informational essay and comes across this paragraph: Lastly, tortoises and turtles share a few major differences. I personally think both are pretty rad and have one of each as a pet. Tortoises spend their time on land while turtles make the water their home. In addition, both species are easily identifiable by the shape of their shells. Tortoise shells are domed and thick; turtles have shells that are flat and thin. Which sentence should Anya remove to revise her paragraph for coherence? In addition, both species are easily identifiable by the shape of their shells. I personally think both are pretty rad and have one of each as a pet. Lastly, tortoises and turtles share a few major differences. Tortoise shells are domed and thick; turtles have shells that are flat and thin.

Answer 1

Answer:

I personally think both are pretty rad and have one of each as a pet.

Explanation:

Answer 2

The sentence which Anya should remove to revise her paragraph for coherence is I personally think both are pretty rad and have one of each as a pet.

This is because it contains a personal opinion which is not necessary in an informational essay as only facts should be included, and not personal opinions.

What is a Revision?

This refers to the edition of the text in order to make it better by removing or adding new information.

Hence, we can see that based on the informational essay being written by Anya, the sentence about the personal opinion of the observer is unnecessary and should be removed.

It is best if she sticks to the factual statements such as:

• Tortoises spend their time on land while turtles make the water their home.
• In addition, both species are easily identifiable by the shape of their shells. Tortoise shells are domed and thick; turtles have shells that are flat and thin

Read more about revisions here:

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