Question

Which sentence in the passage should be revised for wordiness?

Answer 1

Answer:

The sentence that should be revised for wordiness is "In other words, eating a piece of toast, either plain, with butter, or with peanut butter and with a side of fresh fruit, such as a banana, a plum, or an apple, for breakfast is better than eating doughnuts, candy, or ice cream."

Explanation:

Wordiness means taking longer than what is necessary to get to the point. It happens when we use redundant expressions or simply when we use too many words. That is precisely the case in the sentence above. There are too many words, too many foods, being cited to get to the point. Just a couple of examples would suffice to make it clear that caloric foods are not the best option for breakfast.

Answer 2

Sentence 3: "However, researchers ... ice cream." It's not really necessary to provide all of those examples, a few are nice, but the number in that sentence make it seem run on and hard to read.