I would write about something that you are passionate about.
Answer:
It's very beautiful and passionate!
Tips:
-you put "once you get to the top" twice so try changing or deleting the second one.
-some common grammar mistakes (capitalize, correct spots for commas/periods, etc).
-try not to use "etc" in your writing.
-you spelled "realize" as relies
Other than those the story was good!! :)
The last sentence contains an error. It should be “will be playing” or “have been playing” instead of “will been playing”.
