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Leviafan [203]
3 years ago
15

Can someone give me feedback on my thesis statement?

English
1 answer:
user100 [1]3 years ago
4 0

Your thesis statement is a bit wordy. Omit the phrase "and other problems." Change the wording in the latter half of your thesis, as it makes it sound like you are trying to regulate the consequences, not the thing itself. You should also list the consequences. Here's an example of a thesis statement that would sound better (corrections are in bold):

Advancements in genetic engineering such as designer babies have impacted people's lives by getting rid of genetic diseases<u>;</u> however, these advancements should be regulated because of their many consequences, including [consequences here].

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This is shown in the answer above where a lady's movement was compared to a balloon floating.

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That would be an example of a run-on sentence.
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