Question

As we explored this week, late adulthood is a dynamic, rich time of life with many transitions and times of both growth and loss. One of the most profound experiences in late adulthood is that of death and dying – both our own death and the loss of loved ones. In our readings this week, we learned about how important cultural contexts are in understanding the death and dying process. As current/future healthcare professionals, having an understanding of how others process death and grief is key to being able to provide quality support and care. For our final assignment for this class, you will be reflecting on the following scenarios.Part I: Imagine…you are 77 years old. You have lived a happy, fulfilling life, but have recently learned you have terminal cancer and are reflecting on how you want to spend your last few months and what you would like for your final wishes. In 1-2 pages, describe what you would like this last chapter of your life to look like. Consider:What is your cultural heritage? What cultural traditions do you or your family hold that would impact your dying process and last wishes? (i.e. I’m Irish and my family and cultural heritage view death as a time to celebrate the life of a loved one with a long Irish wake, stories about our loved one, laughter, etc. We view funerals as a time to be very emotionally expressive about our loss).How does your family communicate about or view death? What impact does communication with loved ones have on the death and dying process?

Answer 1

Answer:

Death can be truly devastating when heard! The idea of death naturally sends  chills down peoples spines and I for one can not sincerely say anyone can be ready for it, or maybe not!?

Growing up in the western part of Africa (Nigeria) is a special life thrill on its own. I remember growing up as a kid in the southern part of Nigeria and noticing the distinct lifestyle of the people there. I am by nature from the middle belt and we were known for wanting to be in either the Military or Police force and guess what, I had a father who was one! I used to always wake up in the mornings and see my dad preparing for work and I would ask him, Dad, why did you become a police officer? Why not a teacher or an accountant or something? He would hold onto me and look me in the eye saying, "if everyone decides to be a teacher and an accountant, who would help protect those people from the bad guys? I would be like wow! That makes so much sense now and I really appreciate all that you do dad, he would smile and say, "I want you to know that you don't have to own a badge and gun to defend the innocent, always look out for your neighbor, classmates, siblings, and whoever you see in trouble out there!

These were the tenets I decided to live by and I embedded those guides in me and grew with the mindset of always looking out for the next guy.

Fast forward to when I am 35! Guess what, I became a Police Officer just like my dad! lol. Life truly can be funny! My friends would always call me a cops son and I would be like, cut that out already. How about calling me by name though? They would always say that even if I became the President, I would always be a cops son to them because of how security conscious I had always been.

Two years after joining the Police Force, I ran into a damsel that would later become my wife! She was my sisters friend and she came visiting one day and I told my sister that I liked her friend. Tell her yourself she yelled!  I did what I could and after a while, we started dating and within a year, we got married. It was like a dream and I made up my mind to be the best loving husband ever just as my dad was. At 40 we had made three kids already, a quick one right? Yeah, we wanted to make kids early so she rests one time. We kept growing as a loving family, the kids kept growing, they finished high school and then went off to college. My wife opened a retail store and business was moving good. I kept on being the ideal Police Officer my dad had always taught me to be and I kept working hard and gained accolades all through.

A lot had gone by and your favorite police officer had retired, I had just secured my dream home at 75 years old in a suburban area of the nations capital and two out of my three kids had gotten married with a child each. They all came around for Christmas as it was a tradition we held onto tightly. We were making roast at the backyard and all I could remember was having this sharp in my lower stomach and screamed out my wife's name in pain. Gillian I screamed, and she rushed towards me. That was the last thing I remembered.

I woke up on a hospital bed with my wife and kids sitting by my side. What happened I asked? What did the doctors say? Gillian busted out in tears and said, "baby, the doctors said you have gotten Prostrate Cancer and its bad". The doctor coincidentally walked in while she was explaining to me and he said, "I am sorry, we ran a couple of more tests and it's evident you have got maybe a year or less". I was stunned! All of these to be processed within just a day? I wept on my sick bed. I had thought of so many ways to leave this earth but not like this. Lying there, I started thinking of my parents (that were still alive by the way), my siblings, my wife, kids, grand kids, my newly acquired home etc. Did I live a life worth emulating? Was I a great police officer? Did I wrongfully charge suspects? Did I love my family as I ought to have? These were the questions I was drowning in on that bed.

They discharged me from the hospital and sent me home with lots of medications. I told myself that I would not let this sickness kill the joy and greatness around my. I decided to live the best life I could live while still breathing and guess what, I am 77 years old now and still alive. It may be any day now, but I do not care no more. What I care about is the love and bond I have enjoyed with my family and I have told them to keep looking out for themselves while I am gone.

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