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lakkis [162]
2 years ago
8

Which sentence should be revised for clarity

English
1 answer:
vichka [17]2 years ago
8 0

Answer:

I believe the sentence that should be revised for clarity to be letter c) The speech that computer science expert gave regarding online data mining was filled with information also very entertaining.

Explanation:

The sentence above presents a quite confusing structure when it mentions the qualities of the speech. The speaker means to say the speech offered information and entertainment, but he/she does it in a strange manner: "was filled with information also very entertaining." We can sense there is a conjunction lacking. Besides that, the use of parallel structures - words or phrases that have the same function - would also be beneficial to the sentence.

There are at least a couple of corrections we can use to improve this structure, as you can see in the options below:

  • The speech that computer science expert gave regarding online data mining was not only informative but also very entertaining;
  • The speech that computer science expert gave regarding online data mining was filled with information and entertainment;
  • The speech that computer science expert gave regarding online data mining was very informative and entertaining.
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Please Help! Giving out a lot of points for this!
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Answer:

<h2>Story:</h2>

Kane woke up at 6 o’clock in the morning. Instead of getting up, he remained in bed for some time. He had a feeling that it would be an unusual day today.

He had lots of things to do today. First of all, he needed to get a birthday gift for his mom as her birthday was the next day. He decided to get a pet bird for his mom from the paddocks nearby. Mom loves wild colourful birds.

After a quick breakfast, he walked out to the paddocks. He needed a net and a cage for a bird. So he walked to the shed to get them. It is not a big shed and it is not far away from their house, approximate 100 metres away.

He got to the shed, pushed the gate open and walked in. There he was frozen. In front of him, in the middle of the floor, lied something wrapped in a black blanket. He pulled the blanket open and saw a face covered with blood. Out of the shed, he dashed back to their house screaming. He ran every where in their house looking for his mom, but she was no where to be found. “What can I do?” Kane asked himself. “Yes, seeking help from the police”. Many times mom told him that he should seek help from the police any time he was in trouble, and so did the school. He picked up the phone and reported what he saw to the policemen.

Five minutes later, three policemen came. Mom came home from outside too. Together, they went to the shed. The policemen checked the whole shed and found it was a human size doll wrapped in a blanket with some red stuff on the face. Everyone on the sight sighed with a relief. Fortunately, it was a false alarm. The thing in the blanket was a doll, not a real murder case.

However, the policemen had some questions. Why was the doll in their shed? Why was it wrapped in a blanket? Why was there red stuff on the doll’s face? Was it a naughty joke, a black trick or a warning? Whatever, people around should be careful for safety. The policemen brought away the doll and the blanket.

Kane was scared and worried. He managed to walk back home and threw himself onto the coach. Oh dear! What a day! I wish I will never have such a day again!

Mom came to Kane quietly to console him and suggest him to have some rest. Kane could not sleep at all. His mind was still in the shed and the terrible scene he saw. “Mom, I haven’t got you a birthday gift yet. But I do wish you a wonderful, happy and peaceful day tomorrow”! “So will you”, mom said.

<h2>Essay:</h2>

A lot of times in life, people have that one friend that is unforgettable. Some people spend every day with them, because every moment is a moment to remember. Most times when having a good friend, is really all that counts. Of course everybody is not the same, but we all would like to have an unforgettable friend. For instance, when I was dancing with Cortne' Sykes, it was an unforgettable day with a friend, because we had fun, did a great job, and won first place.

First, when I was dancing with Cortne', it was an unforgettable day with a friend, because we had fun. I remembered everything, because the laughter and the bond we had were all good. While dancing, our smiles and enjoyment were all exciting. We also joked around, made up new accounts, and took pictures with other surrounding schools, because we were fun to be around. When it was our time to perform, we were excited and ready to dance. The moment we stepped out, there were cheers and good comments made on the way we carried ourselves. At that moment, I was dancing and having fun because that is was made me happy. I had a lot of fun that day with Cortne' because overall, we both enjoyed our performance.

Second, when I was dancing with Cortne', it was an unforgettable day with a friend, because we did a great job. Even though it was not our first time performing with each other, we did great. Everything we did was together, because we practiced every day until our performance. Our facial expressions and movements were all the same. At one point, Cortne' messed up, but she kept going because she knew the importance of not stopping within a routine. It was a difficult routine, but we pulled through and made the best out of the dance. However, the judges and the crowd did not notice when we messed up, because we kept our heads up and showed energy throughout the routine. We knew what had to do, because we drilled ourselves to never stop and keep going. We did a great job on o...

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