Question

Can you write me a commentary on this poem,

Answer 1

In my opinion, I give you 7/10. That's good

Answer 2

Hey! It’s really great, but some little tweaks would make it even more perfect. For example:
The beautiful ocean shines so bright
as the hot sun in the sky
And, as the waves roll back
When the sky turns pitch black
I would really love to swim
Even more when the ocean waves come to the brim