Answer:Babysitter
Most grandparents would admit that the expectation they are most often confronted with is babysitting. I found that babysitting became my daily job because I was available to bless our children with inexpensive childcare. I wanted to do it, but it is not always something a grandparent desires or is equipped to handle. Babysitting, even with grandchildren, is sometimes a chore and an inconvenience, and I do not recommend allowing it to grow into a habit.
When babysitting is demanded of us, honesty is paramount. There should be an understanding from the beginning that you are free to say “no” when you can’t or don’t want to watch the little ones. As in all relationships, communication will go far to help avoid conflicts. Babysitting can be a time to bless the parents and also bless the grands. We should see it as an opportunity to build love, faith and wisdom into our legacy, their future.
Rule Follower
There is a saying that goes, “What happens at Grandma’s house stays at Grandma’s house.” Unfortunately, we hear all too often that grandparents feel they can do whatever they please because they are grandparents. But part of our job description should be to uphold the rules the parents have set in place. We need to be rule followers, not rule breakers. Teaching a child that he or she can break the parents’ rules when they aren’t looking can come back to haunt us, damage the relationship between the child and his parents, and ultimately harm the child we dearly love.
We must respect the hard-and-fast rules parents have set down. With other rules, we can be slightly lenient if we discuss it with the parents. Whenever my husband and I break the parental rules at our house, we are sure to confess our transgression at the first opportunity. If it was something we planned ahead of time, like keeping them up past their normal bedtime for a special activity, we ask permission beforehand and explain our reasoning. In any case, we are careful to be totally honest with the parents. In that way, we honor their position and show the children that they must honor their father and mother as God has commanded. We must remember that we are secondary in the lives of our grands, and their parents are primary.
Story-Teller
Grandparents have many stories to share, so it’s natural for us to tell them. We can delight future generations with tales of our past and the lessons we learned through mistakes and successes. My husband and I believe it’s important to talk about God as often as possible. Our grandchildren love to hear how God answered prayers, changed our hearts, or saved us from disasters. They appreciate when we learn to tell the wonderful old biblical histories in a new and fresh way, as we see them again through the young eyes of the next generation.
We also tell stories about our childhood friends and other adventures and activities from our younger years, and our granddaughters and grandsons are amazed to hear them. They often keep asking us for “one more story” about our childhood. Even our older grands have asked for those stories. Recently, they asked about love interests we had before we found each other. The big question they finally asked was, “How did you know when you found the right one?” That’s a notable example of how stories often lead to discussions about life lessons and character issues.
Books chosen carefully tell stories that can also trigger good conversations. We love reading with our grands—reading a story to them or having them read to us. Literature, whether old favorites or new finds, can tell stories that resonate with young and old. I remember reading to my grandson, Scott, when he was only days old as I hovered over his crib in the NICU. He doesn’t remember, but I often tell him about those days. In this age of TV, videos, computers and apps, it may take some coaxing to get them to sit and listen, but I have found that if you start young, they remain interested when they sense a good story is in the air.
