Question

Dose this sound good and should i make any Corrections

Answer 1

Answer:

It's straight to the point, which is good but there's a bit of repetition in the phrasing. I revised it for you, I hope it helps.

Explanation:

We decided to establish this business as a way to profit and help the environment, we donate to help the environment by 2% of all sales will be donated to help provide clean drinking water for impoverished families. we decided to set up our business in Mexico because it is super hot we set up shop on the beach because of the heat.

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We've decided to set up a business on a warm sunny beach of Mexico to raise money and help others! 2% of all proceeds will be donated to provide clean drinking water for the less fortunate. We specifically chose this location to help supply those in the scorching heat.