Question

Can anybody give me any ideas for a better introduction for my personal narrative essay was told it's not interesting enough so I need ideas my essay is below thank you in advance
Motherhood with a disabled


My name is Heather I'm 29 years old. I am from Des Moines Iowa. I am going to tell you about my life as a single mother with cerebral palsy while on social security.

I have spastic cerebral palsy. Which causes me to have muscle spasms and also causes me to be really  stiff at times. My left arm is also affected by my CP it is weaker and harder to control. I am not able to walk without some sort of assistance whether it be a walker or a person helping me. I use a wheelchair 90% of the time.

I relied heavily on my mom growing up. She had control of my social security and all important aspects of my life. We were super close at times to close. The loss of my mother in August 2013 was very hard for me. The five years since her passing  I have learned to trust myself and take control of every aspect of my life including speaking up for myself when necessary.

People often assume because I'm in a wheelchair that I have something mentally wrong with me. Oftentimes people ask my friends or family questions about me rather than talking to me. People are often shocked when they realize I'm very independent and can do just about anything on my own.

Growing up my mother told me that having babies could cost me my life during the pregnancy or in childbirth but in July 2016 I found out I was pregnant. My pregnancy was pretty difficult especially towards the end going in an out of the emergency room because I couldn't feel her moving. On February 10th  I was finally admitted  to the hospital because she was causing me a lot of pain  and making it hard for me to breathe. After spending the  night in the hospital and the doctors giving me medicine to try to induce labor my doctor almost decided to send me home and make me wait till my due date. With some convincing from my sister and the fact that I couldn't feel her move in my belly he decided to keep me and broke  my water. Just a few hours later with my sisters by my side two weeks before her due date on February 11th 2017 with no more than IV drugs I gave birth to a healthy baby girl Rose River who I decided to name after my mother Rose.

I receive less than $800 a month from Social Security. I found out shortly after my daughter was born that she would not receive Social Security even though I'm disabled because I've been disabled since birth. My daughter and I have to survive on less than $800 a month and state assisted programs like wik food stamps and public housing.

Rose's father is not in the picture. He has maybe  seen his daughter ten times since she was born. He doesn't help financially. He moved back to Kansas when she was 9 months old and hasn't seen his daughter since.  Thankfully I have a lot of help from my family. They  have all been there for us since the day she came into this world. They help me with getting to and from doctor's appointments grocery shopping and the occasional babysitter so I can have some baby free time. The saying it takes a village to raise a child is absolutely true. I don't know what I would do without my family and all there help. I am eternally grateful for everything they do for us. Rose or baby as everybody in my family affectionately calls her has brought my sisters and my nieces and I closer together.

My daughter just had her first birthday and has recently learned how to walk. She is a wild little monkey these days.  Chasing around a one year old and stopping her from getting into things is one of my newest challenges with her. She loves to run from me when I have to change her diaper or her clothes but I wouldn't change any of it. She is always happy and she's the sweetest baby in the world.

I love watching my daughter learn new things and grow into her own little person. She is so smart it felt like just yesterday I heard her first cry and held her in my arms for the first time. She's growing up so fast it makes me kind of sad but I can't wait to see what new and exciting things the future has for us.

I never thought that I would ever become a mother certainly not a single mother with less than $800 month to live on. It is definitely a struggle but absolutely worth it all.

Answer 1

To me personally this is good but i can help you make it better by using better transitions and stuff just message me or feel free to email me swaggykam00icloud.com or swaggykam00gmail.com
Hope i was able to help,~Kashout kam

Answer 2

You need to start of with a hook to get someone’s attention, Like in your case start with something sympathetic so you catch the reader. and then go to background info and leave with a thought.