Question

Can someone reread my Five - Paragraph Eassy to see what they think about it. Has to include an introductory Paragraph, Three body paragraphs, and a concluding paragraph. Also it has to have in the eassy. " used transitions to connect ideas". " Maintained a consistent voice and tone". " Written with clarity, unity, and coherence". " Revised and edited your draft. I'll post 3 pages of my eassy.

Answer 1

“And played video games, watched movies, played on our tablets,had a water balloon fight.” Is a little too wordy. To fix this, you could say “We played video games,watched movies, and also played on our tablets. In addition to this, we had a water balloon fight.”

Answer 2

It looks good to me! Nice job!