For the first red, you don't need an article before "relationship".
When you're saying "type of [word]", do not put any article before that word.
Example: "a type of device"
Not too sure about the "your back" parts. It could be your teacher does not like repition.
Also not too sure about "did". He probably wanted you to use the word "felt" instead of "did feel"
The first word of the last paragraph should be "in" not "at".
The red commas definitely do not need to be there.
Don't know why he marked "time to" and "to" red.
The Death of A close friend is most likely to be the subject of an elegy!
I hope this helps!
Is taht all of the story or is that it
Because he was young too and this is what happen to him now he want to be young again
