1answer.
Ask question
Login Signup
Ask question
All categories
  • English
  • Mathematics
  • Social Studies
  • Business
  • History
  • Health
  • Geography
  • Biology
  • Physics
  • Chemistry
  • Computers and Technology
  • Arts
  • World Languages
  • Spanish
  • French
  • German
  • Advanced Placement (AP)
  • SAT
  • Medicine
  • Law
  • Engineering
Mekhanik [1.2K]
3 years ago
14

HELP ON GRAMMAR pleasee

English
2 answers:
larisa [96]3 years ago
5 0

Answer:

See below:

Explanation:

This is a nice story! It inspires fear due to the ton of noises you put and the detail into it.

The only change that I would suggest is removing some of the noises in favour of other senses. It appears as if you've mostly only used the sense of hearing.

Also consider making only some of the noises in caps. Some of the noises are in caps but do not need to be in them

Other than that, nice job!!

Have a nice day!

olchik [2.2K]3 years ago
5 0
This is just my suggestions, such as changing it to past tense, I hope that this helps!
(Edited)
SLAM. The door behind me shut, the lights went off. It was dark, it was too dark. l couldn't see my hands, or even where I was stepping, I didn't have a clue. It was surprising enough I didn't trip.
BOOM. It was a big enough sound to be thunder. I raced down the long room, it was like a hall. I knew what was coming next; all my fears coming true. ZAP. FLASH. Lightning struck. Boom. BOOM. thunder pounded. There was a pitter-pattering of rain. It was just racing down and down the hall. Splash. I tripped, but I kept moving. Running or racing it didn't matter. Flash. ZAP. I could still hear the rain and the splashing. The same thing kept repeating in my head, "Don't stop running, don't stop running, don't stop running, don't stop running." My loop of thought got louder and louder, "Don't stop running, don't stop running." I covered my ears while yelling, “Stop, stop!" I kept sprinting down the long hall. I couldn't stop, no I couldn't. I heard sirens, maybe they had come for me. I didn’t care about anything other than getting out of there. The sirens became louder. And louder, and louder. BOOM. Everything was colliding. It was too much, too overwhelming. SCREECH. An awful cry started. My head was still repeating, "Don’t stop, don’t stop." What was happening? I didn't know. There was a ticking noise followed by a screech. Boom. Something flashed. Pitter patter. Tick, tick, tick. Another flash. Screech. Splash. BOOM. SPLASH. What was that? My hands were covered in blood. Flash. Tick tock. BOOM. Tick tock. Screech. Tick tock, tick tock. Boom. Pitter patter. The ticking got faster. Flash. Screech. Splash, SPLASH. I trip, and splash into the water. I couldn’t bare this. I screamed ”STOP IT I SAY! JUST STOP! STOP IT!" A small “drip,drip,drop" sound was the only response I got. I curled up into a ball, lying there, soaked in blood. I cried in the corner, scared to be found, touched, or carried. Seconds turn into minutes, minutes turn into hours, the hours turn into days, the days into weeks, weeks into months, the months into years. I felt to as if I came to death. I couldn't see, nor hear. The only thing i could hear, was the same, “Tick tick tick tick. Zap zap zap zap. Tick, zap, tick, zap, tick, BOOM, FLASH ,tick zap zap tick zap tick, BOOM!”

BOOM, FLASH, Scratch! BOOM, FLASH ZAP, BOOM, SCREECH. It got louder and faster. ZAP ZAP TICK SCREECH BOOM BOM FLASH, ZAP, BOOM SCHRECH tick, tick, tick, BOOM! FLASH, BOOM! ZAP. It just wouldn’t stop, it added on new sounds I knew would come, POUND, POUND, POUND! ZAP, SPLASH, SCREECH, BOOM, FLASH, SCREECH, ZAP, ZAP, TICK, TICK, POUND, SPLASH! BOOM, SQUEAK, SQUEAK! TICK TICK POUND! It started again. It kept repeating over and over. BAM, BAM.
Then it comes back, that little voice... in my head... telling me, to keep going.

Sorry if this isn’t what you meant, or I interpreted it wrong
You might be interested in
Which sentence quotes and cites a source correctly?
NNADVOKAT [17]
C democracy depends on an education public
5 0
3 years ago
Read 2 more answers
100 POINTS!! Identify one way in which the work of de Sacy, Akerblad, and Young was similar.
Misha Larkins [42]

Answer:

A

Explanation:

One of the French experts, Sylvestre de Sacy, started with the proper names in the Greek passage and tried to find their equivalents in the demotic version. He believed that, after he’d sin­gled out the names, he would be able to identify the demotic letters in each of them. With these letters in hand, he could then go on to translate other names and words in the demotic passage.

8 0
3 years ago
Read 2 more answers
Which figurative language technique is used in the following sentence?
natka813 [3]

Answer:

It's c

Explanation:

<em>"Couldn't lived through Christmas without giving you a present"</em>

4 0
3 years ago
What is the them of the poem “hope is the thing with feathers”
Lynna [10]
It can be perseverance, courage, maybe even hope.
5 0
3 years ago
Apexvs ...................
lozanna [386]

the answer is A- Religion

6 0
3 years ago
Other questions:
  • During a speech, your experience as a listener will be hindered if you
    8·1 answer
  • Which types of punctuation can be used to set off a nonrestrictive element in a sentence? Check all that apply.
    9·2 answers
  • Which of the following is the correct format for an MLA InTEXT citation for an article with no known author
    9·1 answer
  • Should teenagers be allowed to have credit cards? Listed bellow are my reasons why?
    7·2 answers
  • 1. What is Mamzelle's reaction to the children<br> leaving?<br> CA sorrow<br> B relief<br> C anger
    5·1 answer
  • What does the narrator are in his dreams while he's in the Place of the Gods
    12·1 answer
  • This is the process of making marks on a written document to correct errors.
    8·1 answer
  • When should readers refer to a dictionary instead of relying on context clues? Select all that apply.
    11·2 answers
  • For what reason does Tomas feel confident about performing in the recital?
    13·1 answer
  • Honey oozed from the jar. The honey was sticky.​
    5·1 answer
Add answer
Login
Not registered? Fast signup
Signup
Login Signup
Ask question!