This is due to contrast in language. Describing a simple and everyday object such an umbrella is not supposed to need formal or logic language and that is, precisely, the comic effect of the comparison.
“Be” verbs. The term “be verbs” is a little deceiving because they include more than the word “be.” ...
Have. The helping verb have is used to make perfect tenses. ...
Do. The verb “do” can perform a variety of functions:
Can, could.
May, might.
Will, would.
Shall, should.
Must.
Linking because i think so sorry if i get it wrong