We got out of school early today, so James and I went over to the deli to get sandwiches. I got a large meatball with cheese. Th
en, we played mini-golf until the guy working there said we were too loud and told us we had to leave. When I got home, I saw that my math homework wasn’t in my folder, so my dad made me go all the way back to school. It was kind of embarrassing to ask my teacher for it." Get focused and show the emotion!
The writer of this passage identifies a number of moments, but does not focus on any.
Choose one small moment from this passage and copy it below.
Add three more sentences that stick with just this one moment and describe it even more precisely.
Consider adding details to help the reader picture what people did, said, and felt in this moment.
I saw that my math homework wasn’t in my folder, so my dad made me go all the way back to school. On the way there, I dreaded asking my teacher. In my mind I attempted to make up what I was going to say ahead of time. After a while, I looked up and saw that I had arrived back at school, took a deep breath, and went inside.
